Just the other day my oldest son asked:
"Daddy, am I old enough to call you Dad?"
Won't be long now before he is asking for the car keys.......
Here are a few things I'm learning as well as some important things I've discovered so far about this thing called fathering.
1. You really have to give up the myth of quality time vs quantity time. By the time the average child is 7 years old, they have watched 20,000 commercials. Given that amount of influence, infrequent "quality time" just doesn't cut it. It has to be quantity time that's of high quality.
2. As a dad you have been influenced and effected by the generations of fathering that went on before you. By the same token, the fathering we do will not effect only the children in our home. The job we do as fathers, for better or worse, will effect generations to come.
3. Sue Shellenbarer, a columnist for The Wall Street Journal has coined the phrase the "tomorrow trap." She describes the tomorrow trap as "living for the future, taking refuge in visions of a relaxed and rewarding personal and family life somewhere down the road.....a kind of mirage that people chase while in reality they are burying themselves in work and other pursuits."
Ouch. Sounds familiar to me, how about you? As dads we have to remember that not only does "someday" never come, it's not even on the calendar. Spend the savored time now, because today is here.
4. Some of us may not have had the best model for a dad in our own father, or perhaps no model at all. That's sad and painful. What it is not is an excuse. It can be a springboard for change. Whatever has been handed down to us, we can decide to change in this generation. There is so much information available now on how to do this dad thing.
5. Just he other day a father asked me "how do I play with my little kids." While it's sad that the question has to be asked, the answer is really quite simple. Get down on the floor with them, and let them lead. You follow.
6. "Daddy's home!" are two of the best words in the English language.
Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
![]() Google News Updated : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 17:51:10 GMT Stem cell promises, obstacles remain four years after bill's approval - San Jose Mercury News San Jose Mercury News - EDITOR'S NOTE: This is first of a two-part series examining the progress and potential pitfalls in California's $3 billion stem cell research program. Researchers find easier way to make stem cells New method generates stem cells safely from mice Publ.Date : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 16:34:39 GMT "Chihuahua" bites Crowe, DiCaprio at box office - Reuters Reuters - LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - The new terrorism thriller "Body of Lies" failed to take the top spot at the weekend box office in North America on Sunday, becoming the latest victim of moviegoer aversion to movies dealing with Middle East intrigue. 'Chihuahua' still has bite in second weekend at box office ‘Body’ Talk, Baby Talk Publ.Date : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 16:19:10 GMT Texas new No. 1 in coaches poll after wild college football weekend - USA Today
USA Today - By Eddie Timanus, USA TODAY The date won't quite live in infamy, but college football followers should remember Oct. 11, 2008, for a long time. Kansas fails to move up in polls Texas grabs top ranking in AP Poll Publ.Date : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 17:18:35 GMT Obama Gains in States Such as Iowa, Florida Give National Boost - Bloomberg
Bloomberg - By James Rowley and Kristin Jensen Oct. 12 (Bloomberg) -- Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama is moving ahead in a series of new polls from Florida to Iowa, gains that are helping him maintain a national lead over Republican John McCain. Video: Kids Vote On Campaign '08 Newsday poll: Obama has double-digit lead on Long Island Publ.Date : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 15:51:54 GMT US-POLITICS Summary - Washington Post
Washington Post - WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Democrat Barack Obama has opened a 6-point lead over Republican rival John McCain in the US presidential race, according to a Reuters/C-SPAN/Zogby poll released on Sunday. John McCain and Sarah Palin try new tactics Pittsburgh Paper Picks Obama, Pans on McCain/Palin Ticket Publ.Date : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 15:22:18 GMT Lisa Marie Presley delivers twins: report - Reuters
Reuters - LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Lisa Marie Presley, Elvis Presley's only child, gave birth to twin baby girls on October 7, celebrity news TV show "Entertainment Tonight" said on its website on Saturday. Twin girls for Lisa Marie Presley Lisa Marie Presley Welcomes Twin Girls Publ.Date : Sat, 11 Oct 2008 17:17:01 GMT Spotlight on Apple notebooks: 1989 to 2008 - CNNMoney.com
CNNMoney.com - On Tuesday, Oct. 14, Apple will unveil the latest addition to a long line of portable computers that dates back nearly 20 years - to the ungainly, 15.8-pound “Macintosh Portable” that PC World named the 17th worst technology product of all time. This week in Apple: New notebooks, new writers, and more Woz Don't Buy A Mac Laptop* Publ.Date : Sun, 12 Oct 2008 15:23:15 GMT Amazon RSS |
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