A Turning Point
19 years ago, I was a young working mother at 28, independent and working for a prestigious company, until circumstances made me choose between family and career. After going through weighing my options, I chose to become a full-time Homemaker because I believed that family should come first if the situation would permit.
However, I had a wake-up call four years ago. It happened on a lazy weekday afternoon when my 10 yr. old daughter arrived from school. As an affectionate habit, I'd kiss and hug her, join her in her room, and help her settle down. It's great hearing how her day has been.
But instead of receiving reciprocal warmth, I got a glowering look plus a creased forehead for a bonus. Although I've been noticing her surly attitude whenever I approached her after school in the past months, such display of rejection sank only during that unsuspecting, lazy, afternoon.
After getting used to doing things together or simply being there for her 24hours a day, a sudden realization that I need to respect certain boundaries did put me off balance. 'Privacy and 'independence' suddenly become the words of the day. She wanted less of the 'intrusive' side of her mom. Her notebooks, slum books, even notepads gradually became confidential.
Gone are the days when she wrote loving notes on mother's day except when it has been required in class, and whispered 'I love you's' for no reason at all. Gone are the days when she wants to be cuddled, to listen to bedtime stories, to sleep through sweet lullabies only I could hum dotingly.
The person in front of me that lazy afternoon was neither an adolescent nor a child. I simply saw a daughter distancing herself from me. And with my son already submerged in his own world, seeing my daughter little by little wanting less of me can really hurt and make me rethink of my role as a Mother and Homemaker, and comparing then and now.
A Change of Direction
I guess with more time in my hand, I've slipped into a limbo, doing things I've been so used to doing but sensing there's no need for them.
With much encouragement from a long time friend and classmate, I was able to pull myself out of that dramatic lull. We did a little brainstorming, assessing some things I can and cannot do at past 40 years of age.
And my love and talent for writing was brought up. The work was the most appropriate and less demanding thing I can indulge in at that moment. The best part was I can work from home, earn a little with less disruptions to the demands of home life, and I learn and grow in the process.
Through this friend's prodding, I started to reconsider the idea and I discovered my fervor to share through writing still burns inside.
I pursued writing although I was apprehensive as I started out late in a competitive field.
Imagining myself as a 'Published Writer' elicited fear, uncertainty, and embarrassment. It is a title or label that can be intimidating and with inherent criteria that may require much to live up to. But I went ahead.
I did not rely on mere talent. I worked on acquiring additional knowledge by investing in books, endless search on the internet, and getting educated through correspondence courses. I practically walked on a self-help journey to reinventing myself.
Answers From Within
After close to five years of writing online and in print, I can say that I made use of that 'wake-up call' wisely without going through much drastic changes.
It is amazing how we could at times come up with a tremendous list of put-downs for ourselves. No wonder some people achieve so less in a lifetime despite being so talented, innately intelligent and with bountiful opportunities right before their eyes.
Sometimes, we need wake-up calls to push us and remind us of latent skills and forgotten passions which become our tools for reinventing our lives.
We all have a significant part of us that get muddled with the chaos of everyday tasks. It is a part of us that lies dormant in the midst of routine responsibilities.
And it is never too late to tap them, to work on them and to revive them.
I've also learned to listen to and recognize messages not readily discernible.
These days, I may be in for another wake up call because it is midlife for me and adolescence for her. There will be more periods of realization and crossroads ahead for both of us. We will have our own crisis to face and ways to understand and tolerate each other.
But before the next wake up call arrives, I am busy being a mom, a wife, and a Writer at the moment, too occupied to take my daughter's intermittent adolescent rejections seriously.
About The Author
Grace V. Planas, Filipino Chinese living in the Philippines, is a Homemaker and part time Freelance Writer. Formerly a Contributing Writer of Working Woman Magazine (Phils), most of her works are currently published online. She writes Poetry, Psychology/Self Help, informative as well as inspirational pieces. Some of her works can be read at TheWriter'sLife, Absolute-DebateDesk, HiddenTalent, The Techmage, Poetrypoem.com, The Ezine Dot Net, LongStoryShort, 1stHolisticLiving.com, Uselessknowledge.com and more.
She holds a degree in Accounting, has completed correspondence courses on Freelance Journalism and Adult Psychology. She has two teenage kids, a boy and a girl, and an extremely supportive husband.
She's been writing since she was in grade school and was a Staffer and later Literary Editor for her School's College paper.
 Google News Updated : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 14:06:59 GMT SanDisk Shares Soar on Samsung Interest - BusinessWeek
BusinessWeek - by Arik Hesseldahl Battered by a year of flagging prices for flash-memory chips and by an inability to get traction in sales of digital media devices, SanDisk (SNDK) may soon get scooped up by South Korean electronics giant Samsung Group. Samsung Weighs Buying SanDisk SanDisk Shares Surge as Samsung Considers Acquisition (Update3) Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 02:28:25 GMT 'True Blood': Undead On Arrival - Washington Post
Washington Post - By Tom Shales You need a very good excuse to dig up the subject of vampires yet again, and filmmaker Alan Ball seems to have one. His "True Blood" is an audacious, outrageous, playfully grisly comic drama (or dramatic comedy) in which vampirism is ... Vampire tale deserves chance to suck us in 'Blood' lacks that dramatic HBO bite Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 03:49:55 GMT Federal Highway Fund About to Run Out of Money - New York Times
New York Times - By DAVID STOUT WASHINGTON - An important account in the federal Highway Trust Fund will run out of money this month, which could hamper completion of road and bridge construction projects across the country, Transportation Secretary Mary E. Peters said ... Highway Trust Fund Is Nearly Out of Gas Bush reverses course, backs road fund bailout Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 20:04:00 GMT Ready, set, go! Real race gets underway - Minneapolis Star Tribune
Minneapolis Star Tribune - By NEWS SERVICES, Washington Post McCain has turned this election into a soap opera about Sarah Palin and her family. Is this what we need to be talking about during these … read more critical times when people are losing their jobs, their homes, ... Palin intrigues Chinese public Annette John-Hall: Pit bull of a hockey mom leading war on diversity Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 13:17:06 GMT Seinfeld ads only part of Microsoft push - United Press International
United Press International - REDMOND, Wash., Sept. 6 (UPI) -- Microsoft Corp. (NASDAQ:MSFT) says it's banking on a new US marketing campaign to fix the image problems of its Vista Windows operating system and connect with customers. Windows Vista: The OS About Nothing Microsoft Works to Perfect Windows Vista Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 13:01:13 GMT Electronic Arts spawns Spore -- which may be a benevolent god - Los Angeles Times
Los Angeles Times - Spore is one of the most-talked-about video games in years, and it was masterminded by Will Wright, the same game developer who was behind the blockbuster Sims franchise. Spore reviewed EA's 'Spore' Set For Earthwide Launch Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 07:01:47 GMT Machinists Go on Strike Against Boeing - New York Times
New York Times - By MICHELINE MAYNARD The union that represents machinists struck the Boeing Company early Saturday, crippling its aircraft production in the United States and potentially delaying the development of an important new plane, the Dreamliner. Contract talks fail; machinists strike Boeing Co. Boeing machinists walk off the job as talks fail Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 13:28:42 GMT RSS Parser |
PARLOT::Ebooks, Scripts,
Websites, and more... Can There Be Any Other Business Like Your Own Business?"Whatever... Read More Many people say that working for themselves or working on... Read More "Discipline is the soul of an army. It makes small... Read More One of the greatest challenges facing our ever intensive quest... Read More There is a saying that goes something like "getting to... Read More Procrastination is of no use to you in your quest... Read More The motivation to change my oil came the other day... Read More Are you willing to stay the course? Once you have... Read More How are things going for you? Are you sitting on... Read More The way you feel about yourself impacts how and why... Read More "Know Yourself" That's what the big guy said way back... Read More What CHOICE do you want to make?Dictionary* says:the act of... Read More Yes, that's me up there! Interestingly enough, I used to... Read More Do you ever get those Sunday night blues? Dreading the... Read More Building Energy Around your Investment!For a century or more men... Read More It was a mild October night, weeks after the horrific... Read More It's about time to take a real hard look at... Read More Many people don't really understand the gift they have been... Read More Each and every day, all of us continually search for... Read More Have you failed to create the life you want, because... Read More Would you like to feel and function like age 40... Read More We can all get in a rut from time to... Read More Do you want to know how the super successful overcome... Read More I don't know about you, but sometimes I feel less... Read More "Things is either done, or they ain't done." Marlon SandersSome... Read More
Adsense
websites
Discover The Spark That Motivates You In Business and Life
Are You IFFY?
Magic In The Leadership Zone!
Are Your Dreams A Day Late And A Dollar Short?
Motivation: No Finish LInes
7 Tips For Unstoppable Motivation And Enduring Success
Get Up and Do!
Staying the Course
Victorious Living
10 Ways to Reclaim Your Self-Esteem
How to Become an Effective Self-Help User
Words That Inspire - CHOICE
Face Your Fears
Cure Your Burnout!
The Magic of Success is Actually a Law Set in Motion. Finding it is Quite Simple
Walk In The Light
Limitations Real Or Imagined, Stick Em In A Pigs Eye!
Are You Facing Challenges? Then Make A Different Decision
Activity Versus Accomplishment
Why Bother About Your Life?
Ten Sure-Fire Rules To Put Old On Hold By At Least 25 Years
Self-Improvement-Inspiration: How to Exit Your Own Rat Race
How Self-Made Millionaires Overcome Procrastination
5 Fun & Easy Ways to Get Out of the Rut
Motivation By Facing Facts
Affordable and Reliable Web Hosting Starting at $4.49/Month
The Solutions to Lifes 10 Biggest Problems!
Every day clients tell me about their problems, often in... Read More
Overcoming the Fear of Getting Started
Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.... Read More
The True Cost Of A Lack of Motivation
And what a lack of motivation means..As you read this... Read More
Motivation-- The Key Is In Your Actions
Have you ever read something like this as a "way... Read More
Pride and Prejudice Can Be Healed and Melted Away
Several years ago, my husband introduced me to some potential... Read More
Are You a Right-Fighter?
Are You a "Right-Fighter"?Do you find yourself struggling to "win"... Read More
Lazy? Or Right on Schedule
Q. I've been working on a big project for a... Read More
Todays Trivia
I received an email today that said I could: "Make... Read More
Going with the Flow
This whole idea of change is founded on a single... Read More
Put Some Fire in Your Desire
One of the keys to success is staying motivated because... Read More
4 Qualities of Highly Successful People
What if you can be, do or have anything you... Read More
If The Fear Fits...Dont Wear It!
Undoubtedly one of the most challenging tasks we can face... Read More
Your Dream Can Be Your Future
Here is a basic truth you must accept and believe... Read More
Christian Gladiators? Athletics as a Metaphor for the Christian Lifestyle
When Paul first arrived in Corinth in the middle of... Read More
This Just Ain?t Good!
"Nope, this just ain't good!" How many times in our... Read More
Pushing Through Your Comfort Zone
Our greatest growth in life comes from pushing through our... Read More
Discover Your Purpose In Life
Everyone has a life purpose; a unique and special something... Read More
Increase Your Energy!
It was only about 18 months ago that I could... Read More
A Quick Observation of the Low Class
We can all learn a valuable lesson about the types... Read More
Procrastination: Hypnosis Can Help You Overcome It
I recently saw a t-shirt with the following saying: "Procrastinate... Read More
Ability, Motivation, and Attitude
"Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what... Read More
All Talk And No Action; So Let It Be Written; So Let It Be Done!
It is so important to know how to motivate ourselves... Read More
Discover How to Stay Motivated and Be Successful
If you surveyed 50 people asking each their definition of... Read More
Citizens of the Land of Opportunity
"We hold these truths to be self-evident: That all men... Read More
People Who Get What They Want: What Are They Thinking?
Imagine being able to choose any outcome and automatically feel... Read More
Motivation |