Attracting Marital Fulfillment, Its Not To Late To Start Right Now

As a personal and professional development coach, I have listened to scores of unhappy marital stories from clients. It is not my intention to pose as a marriage counselor nor therapist, as I am neither. However, via my previous experience as a crisis counselor, and as a partner in an intercultural marriage with its own unique characteristics, I have built up a store of helpful tips, some of which I share with you below.

"To those who choose to marry with love, knowledge and commitment"
is the dedication line in a very important book in my life. This is one of the pre-marital workbooks I used to assess to what extent my husband and I were compatible for marriage. It offers information and questions that help couples examine their attitudes and expectations for married life. Difference in expectations is a common cause of marital discord, and the most unfortunate part is that these expectations are often not discussed prior to making wedding vows. After all, before tying the knot, couples are in that magical state of euphoria and seeming invincibility. "Love conquers all" is the ubiquitous message in popular music and movies. Admittedly, the pedantic, almost arduous activity of talking through pages and pages of questions in preparation for marriage can be a bit daunting. Yet taking the time to do so is guaranteed to save the potential bride and groom time and heartache. Afterward finishing the process, some couples may find out what they may fear most, that they need more time to decide if they are ready to commit their lives to one another. It's better to learn this before the knot is tied. Of course, there is no guarantee that after having gone through a pre-marital question and answer process that a marriage will be trouble-free. However, you will have gained invaluable insight into crucial areas that can make or break-up a marriage, and you will be better prepared to handle issues as they come up.

Whether you're planning to wed or are already wed / in a committed relationship, and would like more fulfillment, using a pre-marital workbook to help you and your partner explore issues is a sensible idea.

The dedication line above is from the book Getting Ready for Marriage Workbook: How to Really Get to Know the Person You're Going to Marry, by Jerry D. Hardin and Dianne C. Sloan, Thomas Nelson Publishers, ©1992. There are other books out there that have similar purposes, this happens to be the one I know best since I've used it in my own marriage. This book does a fairly thorough job of covering the issues, such as:

emotional love
behavioral patterns
family backgrounds
communication
friendship love
time management
perceptions
listening
commitment love
attitudes
household management
financial management
expectations
honesty
covenants to one another
conflict resolution
priorities
anger
ghosts that each partner brings into the marriage
religious beliefs
sexuality
child planning/rearing
lifestyles

Some of these topics may be awkward, yet the book does the job of broaching them for you. The discussion process can be fun, even romantic if you let it be so. And, face it, whether you choose to deal with these issues before or after you walk down the aisle, they will be dealt with in one way or another. For those who have already tied the knot, it's not too late to discuss these issues on an as-needed basis. One thing I like about this book is its covenants - promises that partners make to one another, complete with signature lines. Those signatures serve as a standing record of your mutual honor and commitment.

Do you have questions about the pre-marital/post-marital discussion process? Contact me at mailAThersheywier.com (substitute @ for AT)

Copyright 2005, Hershey Wier

Hershey Wier, BS Education, MBA, is a Career & Self-Development Specialist specializing in holistic, creative approaches to career and life transitions. Visit http://www.HersheyWier.com

---

Google News Updated : Sun, 07 Sep 2008 02:07:34 GMT Google Chrome Reflects A Desktop In Decline - InformationWeek PR Web (press release) Google Chrome Reflects A Desktop In Decline InformationWeek - 4 hours ago After 10 years as a company, Google is making the Chrome browser key to the coming of age of cloud computing, or software as a service. Mozilla updates Firefox 3.1 with Alpha 2 build Computerworld Mozilla releases second Firefox 3.1 alpha CNET News CRN - Milwaukee Journal Sentinel - Examiner.com - Hartford Courant all 231 news articles Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 21:46:03 GMT Rival Tickets Are Redrawing Battlegrounds - New York Times Times Online Rival Tickets Are Redrawing Battlegrounds New York Times - 3 hours ago Senator John McCain and Gov. Sarah Palin held a rally on Saturday at an airplane hanger in Colorado Springs, Colo. By PATRICK HEALY and MICHAEL COOPER Fresh from the Republican convention, Senator John McCain’s campaign sees evidence that his choice of ... On to the main event for McCain, Obama Atlanta Journal Constitution Obama, McCain to Honor Victims of 9/11 Together Voice of America AFP - Hagerstown Morning Herald - Washington Post - Financial Times all 1,434 news articles Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 22:23:34 GMT 'Bangkok Dangerous' - Los Angeles Times Los Angeles Times 'Bangkok Dangerous' Los Angeles Times - 3 hours ago The Pang brothers remake their audacious 1999 film, but without the gritty, seamy feel of the original, it seems like just another bullet ballet out of a Steve Wynn dream. 'Dangerous' prosperous at box office Variety An Assassin Arrives to Turn Off the Lights New York Times Metromix - Reuters - Boston Herald - Portsmouth Herald News all 275 news articles Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 22:52:03 GMT Hot Docs: Defending Georgia, Girls Married by 15, the Chemical BPA ... - U.S. News & World Report CTV.ca Hot Docs: Defending Georgia, Girls Married by 15, the Chemical BPA ... U.S. News & World Report - Sep 5, 2008 A Resolute Strategy on Georgia: One day after Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice announced "at least $1 billion" in aid to Georgia, a Center for Strategic and International Studies report looks at increasing criticisms of such programs. Bisphenol A may harm fetuses, infants and children Food Consumer That Plastic Baby Bottle New York Times eFluxMedia - Los Angeles Times - Washington Post - AHN all 308 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 14:01:40 GMT FDA to List Drugs Being Investigated - Washington Post ABC News FDA to List Drugs Being Investigated Washington Post - 21 hours ago By David Brown The Food and Drug Administration will begin posting every three months a list of drugs whose safety is under investigation because of complaints brought to the agency's attention by drug companies, physicians and patients. The Basics on the Foodfight Over Irradiation U.S. News & World Report 20 Drugs FDA Is Watching WebMD Wall Street Journal - Los Angeles Times - The Associated Press - CNNMoney.com all 535 news articles Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 04:19:40 GMT Tough Game Expected, but Penn State Makes It a Rout - New York Times Washington Post Tough Game Expected, but Penn State Makes It a Rout New York Times - 50 minutes ago By AP Evan Royster rushed for 141 yards and 3 touchdowns, Daryll Clark threw two scoring passes and the defense for 19th-ranked Penn State did not miss a beat without two suspended starters Saturday in a 45-14 victory over visiting Oregon State. Clark, Royster lead Nittany Lions to romp over Oregon State Seattle Post Intelligencer Big Ten early notes: Penn State makes a statement ESPN The Associated Press - SportingNews.com - Dawgman.com - Big Ten Network all 388 news articles Publ.Date : Sun, 07 Sep 2008 01:17:05 GMT 'Wrestler' takes top honors at Venice - Variety 'Wrestler' takes top honors at Venice Variety - 5 hours ago By JEFF SNEIDER Darren Aronofsky's "The Wrestler" has won the Venice Film Festival's Golden Lion. Pic stars Mickey Rourke as a past-his-prime wrestler on the comeback trail. 'Wrestler' wins Golden Lion Hollywood Reporter "The Wrestler" wins Venice Golden Lion Reuters Independent - The Associated Press - guardian.co.uk - TIME all 418 news articles Publ.Date : Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:11:44 GMT Clickbank Affiliate Legitimate Work From Home Jobs

PARLOT::Ebooks, Scripts, Websites, and more...

Adsense websites

Cancun Honeymoon Vacation - Pleasure Unlimited!

The Cancun honeymoon vacation comes with its bagage of sweet... Read More

Choosing the Perfect Wedding Ring

Traditionally, a wedding band was worn on the ring finger... Read More

What Being Best Man is All About

Being a best man is like many duties you will... Read More

Wedding Web Site Design - How to Design a Wedding Site That Others Will Rave About

If you are in the process of design a wedding... Read More

Choosing The Right Music For Your Wedding

OverviewI suppose a typical Christian wedding in the UK can... Read More

The Wide Range of Maui Wedding Ceremonies

Whatever your religious affiliation, or whatever you'd like to experience,... Read More

Slash Your Wedding Ceremony Bills

When it comes to your wedding services alone, nobody wants... Read More

Jewish Wedding Rings - Traditions and Customs and How to Buy Smart

In a traditional Jewish wedding ceremony, Jewish wedding rings play... Read More

It?s Never Too Early to Renew Your Wedding Vows

When you think about couples who renew their wedding vows,... Read More

A Summer Wedding

THE sunshine had come out to ensure the wedding of... Read More

Las Vegas Theme Weddings

"Las Vegas theme weddings are the envy of the world.... Read More

The Charm of a Gatlinburg Wedding

Nestled in the beautiful Smoky Mountains, Gatlinburg's romantic and beautiful... Read More

Getting Great Deals on the Wedding Clothes

If you are planning to have a full wedding that... Read More

Doing Things Your Own Way

No one said that you had to follow the rule... Read More

Save the Date Etiquette: Everything You Need To Know

Save the Date Cards are announcements that inform your guests... Read More

Wedding Preparations - Tips To Get You to The Church On Time

For many brides, the wedding ceremony starts long before they... Read More

A Butterfly Release; Alternatives to Throwing Rice

Brides are looking for different ways to make their wedding... Read More

Bridesmaids Gifts: a Token of Love, Appreciation and Affection

No one has as much fun as the bride to... Read More

How To Pick The Perfect Wedding Dress

Perhaps the biggest worry of a bride-to-be, is picking out... Read More

How to Avoid Destructive Dynamics in Your Marriage

A dynamic that prevents real connection in a relationship is... Read More

Moissanite Engagement Rings ? Find The Perfect Glam You?re Looking For

Wish to make that one day in your life really... Read More

Wedding Flowers and Arrangements?Best Advice from the Experts

Now that you are planning your wedding, you've got to... Read More

For Second Weddings Only - Eight Tips

Planning a second wedding? Prevent favorite guests comparing your second... Read More

Do You Hear Wedding Bells?

So you've been in that perfect relationship for some time... Read More

Your Disc Jockey Acts As A Wedding Event Planner

Give disc jockey's credit. Many of them have endured so... Read More