The Most Important Investment You Can Make For Your Old Age - And No, Its Not Money!

When I was twenty-two, I was befriended by a woman named Doris who was thirty years older than I was. Although Doris was then a fifty-two year old woman, she did not feel it was inappropriate to befriend me. She did not operate with the social belief that she should choose her friends only from people her own age. We became very close friends and remained so until her death at the age of eight-two.

When Doris turned seventy-five, she was already widowed. The week she turned seventy-five, Doris threw two birthday parties for herself, one on a Wednesday night, and one on Saturday. Over thirty different people attended each party. I was the only person invited to both. In all, about seventy of Doris' friends came that week to celebrate her birthday. On both nights many people stayed until past one in the morning.

As I looked around the room at both parties that week in amazement, I noticed that the people attending her birthday parties were of all ages. They included toddlers, teens, middle-aged people, and the elderly. Doris had never restricted herself to making friends only within her own age group. She had always made it a point to befriend people of all ages. Consequently, she did not suffer the same social fate so many elderly people face when their circle of same-age friends starts to dwindle from sickness and death. I hoped that when I was the same age as Doris that I would be able to have as many friends and acquaintances gathered to help celebrate my birthday.

I didn't know any other people her age who could throw two birthday parties in one week, and have seventy people show up. I wondered how Doris had made so many friends. She had never been wealthy, but over the years Doris and her husband had made a practice of opening their hearts and their home to many people. They not only befriended a lot of people and maintained those friendships over the years, but they also befriended the children of their friends, and stayed friends with the younger generation.

I noticed that whenever I brought some of my own friends with me to visit Doris, she never treated my friends as expendable people that she would never see again. She was gracious and kind and interested in all of them. Her caring about each human being was always apparent. When we finished our visit, Doris would often extend an invitation to the friends I had brought to come and visit her again, and many of them did so.

When she issued invitations Doris never seemed as if she were inviting people because she was lonely or desperate for company. Her invitations were always genuinely joyful. She loved meeting people and wanted to see them again.

As Doris neared the end of her life, she became very ill. Yet, she never lacked for love and support from the many friends she had kept making throughout her whole life.

I learned something important that week at Doris' two birthday parties. I realized that we make a big mistake if we tell young and middle-aged people to invest their money for their old age, but neglect to tell them that it is at least as important to invest in relationships with other people.

We make a mistake if we don't tell people that it is just as important to invest kindness in the people we meet, and invest our interest in them. There are other kinds of investment accounts besides those that are held by banks. A big bank account won't make up for loneliness in your old age.

I decided that if I wanted to have as many friends as Doris did, I would have to keep making friends and keep maintaining friendships my whole life. I would have to make friends with people of all ages, including those much younger and much older than me.

Older people confront unique challenges in trying to maintain a satisfying social life. Many people find it difficult to make new friends as they get older.

As people age they often face social, health and monetary challenges. Older people may become less physically mobile. They often have less money to spend on recreation and entertainment. Older people are also more likely to suffer from depression. They may be physically frail and afraid to go out at night. Even if they remain healthy themselves, aging people experience the deaths of long time friends and spouses, resulting in a shrinking circle of social and emotional support.

In the modern western world, older people are often treated as if their usefulness is finished, and as if what they have to say is not really relevant to the young. A lot of older people are shocked to discover when they retire at the age of sixty or sixty-five, that the friendships they thought had developed at work do not survive the retirement party.

In many modern societies, older people are socially marginalized, and left to socialize solely with each other. People in North America are much more segregated along age lines than people in some other parts of the world. In North America, teenagers tend to socialize with other teenagers, and older people are expected to make friends with other older people.

No matter where you live, or what your age, you do not need to follow your local society's dictates about what age your friends should be. You do not need to restrict yourself to making friends only with your own age group.

If you are concerned that you may be lonely in your later years, the time to start doing something about it is now, no matter what your current age might be. As you grow older, make sure you stay living in the present, not in the past. In your conversations with others, don't be fixated on who you used to be, or on your current ailments. Be willing to make many social approaches to others, no matter what the outcome. Stay interested in the current world, stay optimistic, and keep a youthful, open mind.

Royane Real is the author of several self help books available at her website. This article is taken from her new downloadable book titled "Your Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends, and Keeping Friends". Check it out at http://www.royanereal.com

---

Google News Updated : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 08:05:30 GMT Kilpatrick's rise and fall - Detroit Free Press Washington Post Kilpatrick's rise and fall Detroit Free Press - 37 minutes ago BY BILL McGRAW • FREE PRESS STAFF WRITER • September 5, 2008 Kwame Kilpatrick entered the mayor's office with extraordinary gifts -- charisma, savvy, flair, pedigree, connections, ambition and chutzpah -- everything a 31-year-old needed to make a ... Video: A Timeline of Detroit Mayor's Text Scandal AssociatedPress Detroit’s Mayor Will Leave Office and Go to Jail New York Times Chicago Tribune - San Jose Mercury News - DetNews.com - Wall Street Journal all 5,822 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 07:27:50 GMT Stocks: A Terrible Thursday - BusinessWeek Washington Post Stocks: A Terrible Thursday BusinessWeek - 2 hours ago Major US indexes each tumbled nearly 3% as worries intensified over the health of the economy. All eyes are on Friday's jobs report Market players were probably wondering Thursday why they bothered to come back from their summer vacations. Stocks Are Broadly Lower Tracking Falls on Wall Street Wall Street Journal Stocks slide on economic worries CNNMoney.com Seattle Times - Los Angeles Times - Forbes - New York Times all 821 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 05:53:27 GMT Tropical Storm Hanna aiming for Massachusetts - Boston Globe ABC News Tropical Storm Hanna aiming for Massachusetts Boston Globe - 3 hours ago By Andrew Ryan and Martin Finucane, Globe Staff Tropical Storm Hanna is expected to churn up the Atlantic coast and lash Massachusetts this weekend with winds gusting up to 50 mph near the coast and up to four inches of rain. Video: Hanna Nears US, but Stronger Ike Looms AssociatedPress Area departments gearing up for Hanna's arrival Attleboro Sun Chronicle Sun-Sentinel.com - Opelousas Daily World - The Associated Press all 5,279 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 04:23:14 GMT UN warns of Haiti flooding crisis - BBC News BBC News UN warns of Haiti flooding crisis BBC News - 1 hour ago Several hundred thousand people need help in Haiti, which is suffering severe flooding after being hit by a series of tropical storms, the UN says. Attempts to Aid Desperate Haitians Hindered by Floodwaters Washington Post Storms line up to slam western Atlantic, southeastern US AFP Telegraph.co.uk - The Associated Press - Chicago Tribune - Bradenton Herald all 2,575 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 07:05:26 GMT House committee widens probe of Vytorin safety - International Herald Tribune ChattahBox House committee widens probe of Vytorin safety International Herald Tribune - 7 hours ago AP TRENTON, NJ: A House committee investigating the safety and effectiveness of the popular cholesterol drug Vytorin and one of its components is turning up the heat on the drug's makers. Many Questions About Vytorin New York Times Drug Scare Shenanigans FOXNews Reuters - U.S. News & World Report - Forbes - MedPage Today all 547 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 00:32:18 GMT Arthritis Drugs Linked to Risks From Infection - New York Times WNCT Arthritis Drugs Linked to Risks From Infection New York Times - 6 hours ago By AP WASHINGTON (AP) - The Food and Drug Administration ordered stronger warnings Thursday on four medications widely used to treat rheumatoid arthritis and other serious illnesses, saying they can raise the risk of possibly fatal fungal infections. Deaths Heighten Arthritis Drugs Warning WebMD Nation Digest 4 arthritis drugs get tougher warnings Seattle Times U.S. News & World Report - Reuters - Bloomberg all 491 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 01:38:34 GMT Jesse Jackson hospitalized for stomach pains - Chicago Tribune United Press International Jesse Jackson hospitalized for stomach pains Chicago Tribune - 1 hour ago By Jeremy Gorner | Chicago Tribune reporter Rev. Jesse Jackson was being treated Thursday in Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago after falling ill. Video: Rev. Jesse Jackson Hospitalized AssociatedPress Jesse Jackson hospitalized after stomach pains USA Today Atlanta Journal Constitution - Entertainment Tonight News - CNN Political Ticker - AHN all 328 news articles Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 07:00:48 GMT Automate Your Blogging Display RSS Feeds on Your Website

PARLOT::Ebooks, Scripts, Websites, and more...

Adsense websites

Spiritual Bread Making

All the ingredients to make 12 loaves of bread already... Read More

From the Hint of a Rainbow to...

The grey sky of morning contained an ominous quality. The... Read More

The Red Ribbon

Everyone wants a blue ribbon. Blue. First place. The best.... Read More

A Life Time of Strategic Thinking

You may be one of the thousands who think "Strategic... Read More

Harsh Reality

Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 25,... Read More

Duplicity

Direct Answers - Column for the week of January 26,... Read More

Self Talk: What Do You Say When You Talk to Yourself?

You have just completed a major work project before the... Read More

Something About Nothing

Buddhists study nothing because they have found that you must... Read More

Who Are The Underminers?

How many of you had the experience growing up of... Read More

Tsunami

This article was channelled through me by an entity called... Read More

The One Thing You Really Want

There is one thing you want...My guess is you want... Read More

Each Moment Is To Be Treasured

Let us grasp and treasure each precious moment of our... Read More

Resistance to Change

All of us are resistant to change, whether it's in... Read More

Personal Philosophy is Like The Set of The Sail

We have all experienced the blowing winds of disappointment, despair... Read More

The Climbs In Our Lives

I grew up climbing mountains. Mountains are beautiful and challenging,... Read More

Sixty-Second Caring

"How are you doing?" you ask. There's a pause before... Read More

Succeed by Whistling While You Work

Mark Twain (1835-1910) believed that having fun is important if... Read More

My Mothers Garden

I love to talk about Purposeful Living with others and... Read More

The Most Famous Line I Never Wrote

There is one line that can dramatically impact your life... Read More

Where Has All the ENCHANTMENT Gone? Long Time Passing

I thought you might enjoy reading a professional article I... Read More

The Best Gift to Give Yourself and Others

I'm often asked the question, "How can I best help... Read More

How To Be Secure In An Insecure World

Most of us believe that our happiness and security are... Read More

The Rumble in the Jungle: Revealing Greatness

The other night I was watching a documentary on that... Read More

Worship and Football: Lets Take Another Look

At a recent seminar we were asked to imagine if... Read More

Magical Wreaths

Wreaths are like rings. They represent the Universal Circle ("Let... Read More