We are all familiar with or have heard of the many Twelve Step programs and communities. The reason the 12 Steps are so effective in helping people create happy, joyous and free lives is because it is a program of solution based on principles written so simply that anyone can use them in their daily lives. As partly a Sober Living Coach, agapelegacycoach.com I team up with clients who already have a strong recovery foundation to transition from recovery into enhanced Sober Living. I also coach those who wish to craft and design Legacies of Excellence in all areas of their lives who are not familiar with 12 Step Living. In my coaching career, all of my clients have shared many successes by allowing me to bring them some of the indispensable tools I have come to live by as a proud member of the 12 Step Community myself. Here are some proven effective 12 Step Community tools to add to your toolbox:
1. If you're not the problem there is no solution:
People have tendencies to focus on others being the cause for problems. Waiting for others to change keeps them in charge of how your life looks and moves. Living in this mindset, you might be waiting a very long time for desired results and relief via others' actions. Take your power back and look into what only you can change.
2. If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting:
If your life is not where you want it to be, then investigate other ideas and options. If things are moving well, then remember " If it ain't broke don't fix it!"
3. Check your motives:
The choices and actions we make based on only our plans, schemes and designs for other's lives are the ones that place us in positions to be hurt, let down and disappointed time and time again. When faced with an action or choice, ask yourself, "Why am I doing this?" Although our motives seem sincere at times, there is always a chance that we are operating out of what we want for ourselves. When self-centeredness is the motive, others around us tend to respond in defensiveness and anger.
4. Trust God and clean house:
Trust that God or the Universe will take care of the outcomes. Make sure your side of the street is clear of wrong motives, actions, unmade amends and apologies for your own behaviors. As they say in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, "a business that takes regular inventory rarely goes broke."
5. Watch your expectations:
High expectations ? High disappointments? Low expectations - Low disappointments
One sign of living in "It's all about me" might be that you are using your "personal rights" to govern the behaviors of others . Humility and acceptance are the tools when struggling with unfulfilled expectations.
6. Get a competent sponsor and use them:
Mentors, coaches and community add such tremendous value to our lives. Have a solid support network that you trust and then follow their suggestions.
7. If you want what I have, you'll do what I did:
Be supportable and open to using the experiences of your mentors, coaches or support group. Don't question support from others when they offer ideas that make you uncomfortable or suggest a call to action. Just choose others with successful experience and not opinions.
8. By admitting powerlessness, you are actually gaining power:
This simply means to step back and stop operating out of reaction or control. What person, place or thing are you allowing to run your life? This is living from external forces while happy, joyous and free is an internal job for you to master.
9. Stop letting it rent space in your head or stop focusing on the problem:
If there is nothing you can do about it today, and if it is something that you have no control over, focus on productive things to spend valuable time thinking about, like gratitude or the relationships and outcomes that are working in your life.
10. Share experience, strength and hope:
Don't waste you time with people who lead or support others by opinion, embellishing who they are or just plain make things up. You're time is valuable. Surround yourself with people who can really support you through things because they have "been there, done that" and are now where you want to be. Community is invaluable for building thriving relationships and support. We all need friends and mentors who see past our blind spots and will kick us in the behind to get us back on track.
11. Work with others:
Community and support work both ways. Be available for others that need your expertise or experience to learn by or lean on. Give back what is freely given to you. Service work of any kind, such as Habitat for Humanity, The Special Olympics or which ever direction you are pulled toward, will create healthy ways of giving and keep you out of your head should you feel down or isolated or uninspired. Remember, if you're not having fun then something is not working!
Elizabeth Tull is a professional Excellence coach that bridges the Recovery Community and Professional Coaching. She works with those seeking to enhance sober living and communication as well as those who wish to create Legacies of Excellence. You can e-mail her at Elizabeth@agapelegacycoach.com or visit on the web http://www.agapelegacycoach.com
![]() Google News Updated : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 14:05:39 GMT Nokia Forecasts Drop in Third-Quarter Market Share (Update1) - Bloomberg
Bloomberg - By Juho Erkheikki Sept. 5 (Bloomberg) -- Nokia Oyj, the world's biggest maker of mobile phones, forecast a drop in third-quarter market share after competitors slashed prices and a new handset was delayed. Nokia Sees Market Share Slipping in Third Quarter Nokia Lowers its Third Quarter 2008 Mobile Device Market Share Outlook Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 12:50:07 GMT Dell looks to sell factories worldwide - CNNMoney.com
CNNMoney.com - By Scott Moritz Dell (DELL) is getting more serious about trimming costs and is exploring plans to sell its PC manufacturing plants, according to a news report Friday. Dell said to consider sale of factories Ahead of the Bell: Dell may sell plants, WSJ says Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 13:15:09 GMT Reviews of McCain's speech - MSNBC
MSNBC - The AP’s Ron Fournier says McCain “preached bipartisanship and unity from a stage retooled to carry him out to the Republican faithful. McCain: I work for you ‘Change is coming,’ McCain tells GOP in speech Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 13:35:16 GMT Lebanese ruling majority accuses Syria of interfering in Lebanon - Xinhua
Xinhua - BEIRUT, Sept.5 (Xinhua) -- Lebanese ruling majority accused Syrian President Bashar Assad of interfering in Lebanese internal affairs and not recognizing Lebanon's sovereignty, local press Naharnet reported Friday. Video: Sarkozy in Syria : the press is divided Editor's Notes: A losing battle, so far Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 11:59:29 GMT In Long-Awaited Maps of Cancer, The Breakthrough Is the Problem - Wall Street Journal Wall Street Journal - By GAUTAM NAIK After struggling for years to improve the treatment of cancer, scientists now hope to fight the disease with the help of the same techniques that deciphered the human genome eight years ago: mapping it. What You Need to Know About Mapping the Cancer Genome Data on defective genes make tailored remedies possible Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 04:01:28 GMT PIECING TOGETHER A PLEA How the deal got done - Detroit Free Press
Detroit Free Press - BY JOE SWICKARD • FREE PRESS STAFF WRITER • September 5, 2008 Prosecutors rolled Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick's plea deal into court Thursday praying the wheels wouldn't fall off. Detroit Mayor Acknowledges 'Poor Judgment' Detroit mayor pleads guilty, to leave office Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 07:57:24 GMT Lavrov rejects Cheney's attack on Russia - CNN International
CNN International - By CNN's Matthew Chance MOSCOW, Russia (CNN) -- Russia on Friday rejected sharp criticism by US Vice President Dick Cheney that its intervention in Georgia raises doubts about Moscow's reliability as an international partner. Video: Cheney Slams Russia for War Against Georgia Russia says Cheney fanning Georgian aggression Publ.Date : Fri, 05 Sep 2008 12:45:40 GMT Legitimate Work From Home Jobs |
PARLOT::Ebooks, Scripts,
Websites, and more... From the moment we wake in the morning our heads... Read More The one feature that sets life on Earth apart from... Read More Want to make a difference? What can one person do?... Read More How can one be happy? Is it a tough question?... Read More True happiness is such a rare commodity that the whole... Read More The freeway was relatively clear. It was early in the... Read More The decisions we make everyday have a big impact on... Read More Can money buy happiness? It's easy to say no, and... Read More Sometimes change is pleasant. A child is born. A new... Read More Want to be happier?Edward W. Smith, motivational speaker, author and... Read More The seeds you sow determine the crop you reap. This... Read More Did you see any of the Live 8 performances in... Read More In Key Reason #1 we looked at how you are... Read More Many of my clients are working harder than smarter. This... Read More One of the most important colors in advertising is the... Read More Taking a Magickal Bath doesn't have to be complicated. It... Read More When it comes to happiness, togetherness is probably the most... Read More Did you know that there are gifts that will multiply... Read More What if I told you that you have the ability... Read More Many people live in clutter, emotionally eat themselves into overweight,... Read More What does it take to be happy? In our age... Read More This month I'm going to talk about something I've never... Read More Joy is sexy because in embracing our joy, we embrace... Read More Who is the happiest person in America? USA Today featured... Read More Do you want to put a smile on someone's face?... Read More
Adsense
websites
What NOT To Do To Feel Good About Yourself - 10 Tips
Suffering and Happiness
Get Right! Make a Difference
Being Happy
What is Happiness and How to Achieve It?
Getting Out Of Dodge
You are Where You are Because You Decided to be There
Maybe Money CAN Buy Happiness
Inevitable Changes and Changeless Connections
Quick Steps On Being Happier
Flow as in Flower
A Shortcut to Happiness -- Vote with Live 8
5 Keys to Understanding Why Your Life (probably) Sucks! #2
Get Out Those Legos
Colors: How Do They Make You Feel?
Magickal Baths
Being Together
7 Gifts that Multiply Happiness
Choose To Be Happy
Getting To The Root Of Unhappiness
What Does It Take To Be Happy?
The Golden Moments in Life
Joy Is Sexy
Happiest Person In America: Whats Sex Got To Do With It?
7 Unique Ways To Make Someone Smile
I have never lived anywhere else where when you walk... Read More
When it comes to happiness, togetherness is probably the most... Read More
Can you remember a time when you became a little... Read More
Romance is conveyed in so many different ways.One less commonly... Read More
As a teenager growing up reading 'Blue Jeans' and 'Jackie',... Read More
I used to work for the Independent National Newspaper in... Read More
Where does happiness fit on a scale of 1 to... Read More
Are you an adrenaline junkie who is looking for balance?... Read More
As a coach, I often ask myself the question why... Read More
1. Mend a quarrel Seek out a forgotten friend and... Read More
Just when you think you know it all, some 17-month... Read More
We are a pleasure seeking society. Most of us spend... Read More
Everyone has issues with self esteem. It's no wonder then... Read More
Happiness comes to a person when it is caused by... Read More
My journey to becoming a therapist began with a desire... Read More
Many people exercise, play sports, or know someone who does.... Read More
This month I'm going to talk about something I've never... Read More
So many people overwork themselves literary in the quest for... Read More
Did you see any of the Live 8 performances in... Read More
People's lives today are jam-packed with great projects, ideas, to-do... Read More
Whatever we want in life, a partner, more money, good... Read More
What does it take to be happy? In our age... Read More
Sometimes we are so occupied with our daily routine in... Read More
Sometimes change is pleasant. A child is born. A new... Read More
I started thinking about this topic during a discussion of... Read More
Finding Happiness |