Getting Connected
"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." -James Oppenheim
Today is very special. Besides being your "un-birthday", it's the first day of the rest of your life.
We've all heard that one. We acknowledge the wisdom and move on --- checking our watches and calendars to see how long before the "good stuff" starts happening.
Our impatience and anxiety prevent us from focusing our awareness on "now". As a result we never discover it's full potential or give ourselves permission to enjoy it.
We recognize many important holidays on the calendar; Christmas, New Years etc...and these are the times when we have permission to celebrate.
Surprisingly, many people report having "depression" around the holidays. Could it be that our enjoyment muscles have grown flabby or that we've been driving ourselves nuts to get there.
Just as we don't have permission to enjoy "now", we also don't have permission to enjoy "here". We can't wait to go on vacations to visit the "good places"
We're certainly not allowed to enjoy our jobs. We want to move on so that we get to be with the "smart people".
Within any given day, certain places and times are more important than others: --- getting to work --- and once we're there --- getting home. Meal times are "biggies" --- important events. Is it any wonder that many of us have weight problems.
Where am I going with this? We shouldn't go to work? We shouldn't eat?
No. Go ahead and do all those things. You'll do them much better when you learn to slow down and connect. The difference is that you'll feel better about things.
Connect to what?
To "here" and "now": Our immediate experience separated from what the Zen masters call "the monkey mind" --- our obsessive conceptualizing and labeling of things.
The ability to practice "non-thinking" and focus on immediate experience is called "mindfulness". In other words, when you're washing the dishes, you're washing the dishes.
Non-thinking is not easy. It's a habit which has to be learned. The key is attention to our breathing. It provides something on which to focus.
Starting your day with a daily "non-thinking" exercise or meditation is the best thing you can do if you want to connect. It provides a fresh image of what it feels like to relax. You can accomplish this in as little as ten minutes or even less once you're used to it.
Just find a comfortable spot and relax. Clear your mind of all thoughts --- even the one's you think are important. Pay attention to your breathing. Don't force it. Your body knows how to breathe without you telling it to. Just go along for the ride. But, breathe through you nose. For some reason it helps. If thoughts intrude (and they will!), simply redirect your attention to your breathing.
If you're unsure about how long you should do this, just set an egg timer for ten or fifteen minutes.
If you'd like more detailed instructions and some good tips, try Christopher Calder's excellent site, The Meditation Handbook.
Many schools of thought hold that what you are connecting to when you meditate is much, much, more than just relaxation. I tend to agree. But, expectations can be very distracting when you're getting started. It's important that while you're meditating you feel whatever it is you feel. Not, what someone tells you you're going to feel.
Once you get the hang of it, you'll have a wonderful way to start your day. You'll also learn eventually how to "re-connect" throughout your day --- take little "vacations" --- any time you want. They won't cost a dime and you'll feel better about things.
Bob Steinman (AKA 'Feelbetterman') resides in Orlando, Fl. with his wife, 13 year old son, and a totally spoiled female Shih-Tzu. He is retired following consecutive careers in academics and human services. Presently he aspires to write a definitive self-help book which will present his unique perspective on how to live in harmony with ourselves and our life situations. His web site,Feel Better about Things provides a means to fine-tune his writing and also communicate with those who have interest in his work.
 Google News Updated : Sun, 06 Jul 2008 06:55:22 GMT McCain Battles a Nemesis, the Teleprompter - New York Times
New York Times - Mary Altaffer/AP By MARK LEIBOVICH LAS VEGAS —Senator John McCain was performing relatively smoothly as he unveiled his energy plan. McCain Campaign, in Relaunch, Seeks Tighter Message Focus McCain Campaign on Obama and Iraq Publ.Date : Sat, 05 Jul 2008 23:31:52 GMT Obama "puzzled" by Iraq comment frenzy - Reuters
Reuters - By John Whitesides, Political Correspondent ST. LOUIS (Reuters) - Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama said on Saturday his plan to end the Iraq war was unchanged and he was puzzled by the sharp reaction to his statement this week that he ... Obama struggles to thread needle on Iraq Obama Refines the Blame on Iraq Miscue Publ.Date : Sun, 06 Jul 2008 05:08:23 GMT Ore. man completes flight of fancy _ in lawn chair - The Associated Press
The Associated Press - CAMBRIDGE, Idaho (AP) - Using his trusty BB gun to help him return to Earth, a 48-year-old gas station owner flew a lawn chair rigged with helium-filled balloons more than 200 miles across the Oregon desert Saturday, landing in a field in Idaho. Video: Ore. Man Uses Balloons and a Lawn Chair to Fly Believe it or not, he's lounging on air Publ.Date : Sun, 06 Jul 2008 05:50:31 GMT Smallest planet shrinks in size - BBC News
BBC News - The smallest planet in the Solar System has become even smaller, studies by the Messenger spacecraft have shown. Data from a flyby of Mercury in January 2008 show the planet has contracted by more than one mile (1.5km) in diameter over its history. First Results From Messenger's Mercury Flyby Mercury is shrinking, NASA craft finds; a cool clue: 'lobate scarps' Publ.Date : Fri, 04 Jul 2008 11:45:26 GMT Hippie Arrests Draw ACLU’s Attention - New York Times
New York Times - By AP CHEYENNE, Wyo. (AP) - The American Civil Liberties Union said on Saturday that it would investigate the actions of federal officers who had arrested five members of the Rainbow Family in western Wyoming during the group’s annual gathering. ACLU plans to investigate Rainbow Family treatment ACLU to investigate Rainbow Family treatment Publ.Date : Sun, 06 Jul 2008 00:40:38 GMT Analysis: McCain struggles to regain footing - The Associated Press
The Associated Press - WASHINGTON (AP) - John McCain calls himself an underdog. That may be an understatement. The GOP presidential candidate trails Democrat Barack Obama in polls, organization and money while trying to succeed a deeply unpopular fellow Republican in a year ... Rural voters lean to the GOP Neither Obama nor McCain meets Energy Party standard Publ.Date : Sun, 06 Jul 2008 04:40:55 GMT Argentine Lower House Passes Grain Export-Tax Plan (Update3) - Bloomberg
Bloomberg - By Eliana Raszewski July 5 (Bloomberg) -- Argentina's lower house of congress approved the government's plan to increase taxes on exports of grains and oilseeds, risking a resumption of three months of strikes by farmers. Export Tax That Angers Farmers Advances in Argentina Argentina lawmakers approve farm export tax hike Publ.Date : Sat, 05 Jul 2008 22:41:30 GMT Increased Website Traffic |
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